This Friday December 15th We, the Evangenitals will be playing our last
show of 2006 at the Old Towne Pub in Pasadena.

I would very much like you to be there, if you can. There are many
reasons for this. I will list them, and you can pick whichever you
like, put it in your pocket, and come see the show.

1. This is the last Evangenitals show of '06.
(see explanation above)

2. The last show was so friggin' dope, and this one is gonna be even
better.
Need proof? Watch this video from the last show. If you were AT the
last show (Kent, Leslie, Sharon, Alan, Joseph, Eliot etc) you may find
yourself IN the video!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0xdZjSq-ydA

3. This is a fundraiser for our next album.
In January we will be hitting the studio to lay down tracks for all
your new, favorite songs that weren't on the first album. Like Fuck
'em All. So if you have wanted a recording of Fuck 'em All, come to
the show, and we will be able to make you one in January. We need
$600 to pull this off, and all proceed from the show go toward the
new album.

4. Because we love you.
We really do. Always have, always will. Seriously.

5. The "Super-Deluxe Medley of Cover Songs".
I'm not kidding. This medley will blow your mind, and you can only
hear it live, this time, while we've got the Holiday Balls to go
through with it.

6. We (10:15pm) are playing with the Natural Disasters (9:30pm) and
the Purple Gang (11:15pm) which means we have the musical spectrum
covered, from punk rock to blues to hillbilly soul to psychedelic
rock to 50's doo wop. We got it. Come n' get it.

7. There will be press coverage, celebrity photographs, and we need
your sexy faces to come make us look good. Video interviews.
Paparazzi, baby. This is Hollywoodland. Put your face on and be
seen.

If none of these reasons prove sufficient to encourage your presence
at this epic show, (or if you happen to be in another state, which is
a decent excuse) please at a minimum send us your good, supportive
thoughts and prayers.

And please be sure to check out ALL the new Evangenitals videos on
YouTube, and don't forget to leave us some comments!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0xdZjSq-ydA

The Evangenitals & Friends
Holiday Hoe-Down
Old Towne Pub Pasadena
66 N Fair Oaks Ave
Pasadena, CA 91103
Price: $5
9:30pm Natural Disasters
10:15pm Evangenitals
11:15pm The Purple Gang

All my lovin'
Juli Crockett
The Evangenitals
http://www.evangenitals.com

Hello Friends.

This is a video capturing an epic occurence that I'd like to share with you. It shows me, Juli Crockett, and my band, The Evangenitals performing at the Old Towne Pub in Pasadena. Caught on this tape is the moment where I, Juli Crockett, first performed an Evangenitals song STANDING UP on stage, rather than safely seated in a chair.

It was disorienting, frightening, and totally awesome. I would very much like to do more of it, as you may note that I could use a little practice.

p.s
I'm not drunk in this video... I'm just gaining my sea legs. ;-)


Please have a look, and leave us a comment: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0xdZjSq-ydA

Cum in my pants.

That's what this picture makes me want to do.

Kyle Gass of Tenacious D & Trainwreck fame, posing with my band sticker. Aww yeah, man. We Arr The Evangenitals!

This Friday Night at the Old Towne Pub in Pasadena the Evangenitals are playing a show. We are also celebrating drummer George Bernardo's birthday, and shooting some live video footage for posterity.

We are ALSO celebrating the fancy new *tm* that we can now legally put next to the Evangenitals(tm) name, because, frankly, WE OWN THE WORD!!! Hooray!

A Brief History:
Invented by Juli Crockett on a ho-hum day at work in early 2003, the term "Evangenitals"(tm) became the name of a faux band, consisting of buddies and coworkers Juli Crockett, Lisa Dee, and Brett Lyda. Flash forward to an open mic appearance, designed to help Juli cope with her "shyness" and the rest is history. And your part of it. Come witness more history in the making at the Old Towne Pub.

Look at what Brett did! It's the Evangenitals Video Debut on YouTube!

For the love of all things good in the world, please register to walk with us, TEAM EVANGENITALS, in the AIDS Walk Los Angeles on October 15th!

We need at least 20 walkers on our team to qualify for our very own Team Meeting Station, and gad'dangit... we want TEAM EVANGENITALS to be a spectacular demonstration of Evangelistic Genital Joy on this day!

It costs nothing but a few hours of your time to walk with us, so please SIGN UP HERE!

If you can't make it and you'd like to make a donation to the cause, you can do so on the so RIGHT HERE.

MAJOR THANKS TO AEBN, XPEEPS, AND THE STOCKROOM FOR THEIR SPONSORSHIP OF TEAM EVANGENITALS!

Thanks,
Juli C & Lisa Dee
Evangenitals

***

TEAM MEETING STATION DEADLINE

Wednesday, October 4

In order to qualify for a Team Meeting Station at the AIDS Walk you need to have at least 20 walkers registered on your team by this coming Wednesday, October 4 at NOON. A Team Meeting Station is a table with your team name on a sign. Walkers will still be able to register and raise money for your team after this date, but they will not count towards qualifying for the Team Meeting Station. As an extra incentive to recruit walkers by next Wednesday, Chipotle has generously donated the prize for our next registration competition!

WIN 100 FREE CHIPOTLE BURRITOS!

The two teams that register the most walkers between today, Friday, September 29 at 5:00 p.m., and Wednesday, October 4, at NOON, will each win 100 Chipotle Burrito Bucks (good for one free burrito) for their team! Last year during this week, over 4,300 walkers registered on teams, and one team alone registered 159 walkers, so the competition promises to be fierce!

Use the Burrito Bucks to have a team celebration fiesta after the walk or give them out as “Thank You” to your donors.

Good gracious, we're in the big leagues now. With the production of our new Super Mega Promo spot, which can be found all over the Intra-Web as of right now, we are now feeling the pressure of delivering the BIGGEST Big Love Revolution yet on September 11th at the Derby.

Lord help us let the show live up to the crazy hype of this WWF-style Monday Night Fights promo commercial that Brettsky whupped up for the show:

Listen to the Madness on the Monday Night Promo, Here.

You can also hear this bizzness on YouTube and comment, rate, pass & share it. It's on the Myspace page too, beautiful people.

Hook it up. Spread the word. We're bringing the love cannon to the Derby. The world needs it, and we need you.

Much Love,
Genital Julius

An eyewitness reported seeing one Julio Crockett of the Evangenitals at Dr Music in Eagle Rock, California last weekend purchasing a fistfull of brightly colored Kazoos and an official Snoopy Mouth Organ.

She was in the company of one Rev. P-TryXXX Demention of the SouperKlawBrazzz who was observed purchasing a purple guitar strap and shaking a plastic banana.

At this time we are unclear on what Juli and the Evangenitals plan to do with all those Kazoos, though there is speculation that all will be revealed at the upcoming BIG LOVE REVOLUTION going down at the Derby on September 11th.

There are rumors of prizes, surprises, and new songs.

More news, coming soon.

Well, every once in a while I just like to take a beating for the hell of it... and that is why I entered the Evangenitals' showtune "The Sun is Shining" into the rotation for reviews at GarageBand.com. Yes folks, this is the same place in which one keen reviewer criticized The Work Song for being "repetitive".... god I love the music scene.

It will be interesting, to say the least, to see what kind of reception Sun is Shining will get over there.

In other news...

Join TEAM EVANGENITALS for the AIDS Walk Los Angeles on October 15th! We're forming a team, we're taking donations, we're raising funds and awareness for AIDS research! For us, it makes perfect sense that the Evangenitals should do all we can to protect the Genitals of the world and keep them happy, healthy, and holistically high-functioning!

Come walk with us!

Click here for more information, to sponsor, and to join the crusade!

Hello All.

This may seem like commandeering the Evangenitals' blog for strange other purposes, but if you live in Los Angeles and want to have your arty roots shaken like a fruit tree till the ripe sweetness falls off and deodarizes the globe, you'll thank me for telling you about this.

I am Juli Crockett. I am the lead singer of the Evangenitals. However, I am also a writer and director of experimental theater, and I have made an Opera.
http://redcat.org/season/0506/com/now3.php

My friend Jeremy Zuckerman, who also happens to compose for the awesome show Avatar: The Last Airbender on Nickelodeon, composed this piece with me.

Lisa Dee of the Evangenitals is featured in the piece, acting and singing. And Jeff Jones and myself play in the 10 piece musical ensemble which includes violins, a harp, contrabass, pedal steel, and a bulgarian folk singer, among other things. With all those Genitals in the mix, it pretty much merits as Evangenital news, I say!

The piece is called "Orpheus Crawling" and it is my child-like, half-crazed, totally-delightful, slightly-disturbing, philosophically-rooted riff on the myth of Orpheus and Eurydice. It is an Opera. I guarantee you have never seen anything like it. I know this because Jeremy and I made it up. From start to finish.

It is playing at the REDCAT Theater in Los Angeles, closing out the NOW Fest (new original works) in that freaking metal Gehry building downtown. It runs from August 3rd-5th. Bring the kids. What doesn't kill them will make them stronger.

You can buy a ticket here: www.redcat.org

It is expected to sell out, so please really do go and buy a ticket.

For directions, more information about the show, ticket, pictures, etc. Go to the REDCAT site, here:
http://redcat.org/season/0506/com/now3.php

Thank you for supporting the arts in Lost Angeles.

Love,
Juli

it has occurred to me that it may be high time that we* actually begin to enter the discourse of talking about what's going on with the evangenitals. what does it mean, what is the mission, is this for us to say? will it jinx the magic if we look at it closely? i can't help but look at it. it is so beautiful.

*we meaning you and me. yes you.
please enter the discourse.
hurry.

I just realized I've been publishing my personal poo in the wrong blog! Hells bells.

Here's some Evangenitals news for you:

This just made my friggin' day....

Check out the Dancing Duo!

Thanks Banjo. You just earned yourself the eternal love of the Evangenitals. And a free T-Shirt to boot!

Rock on.

Hello Sunshine.

This is, without a doubt, the most action-packed Evangenitals weekend
yet.  So, I'll start with what I consider to be the most important
thing:

This Saturday.  April 29th.  9pm Sharp.  The Evangenitals are tearing
the roof off of Highland Grounds.  Guaranteed.

Yes, I know that's some tough talk, and I CHALLENGE ye to come and
throw down with what we got in store for you.

The Evangenitals are on fire with new songs and the eye of the tiger,
our new drummer George is playing his GIANT kick drum, and new-daddy
Dave "Salad" Salardino is back on the Banjo and Mandolin.

That's 6 of us versus 1 of you.  We're gonna hump your eardrums like
wild rabbits, buddy.

Best of all, it's just $5 w/ an EvanJunkie Card or Flier.  That is, I
assure you, the best damn deal in town!

Here's the tempting morsels:

Flier that gets you in for just $5:
http://www.evangenitals.com/images/hugecomicflier.jpg

New Traxx to whet yer whistle:
Sun is Shining
http://www.evangenitals.com/music-4.html
Ode to Scientology
http://www.evangenitals.com/music-5.html

All the details are at http://www.evangenitals.com/calendar.html

If you do nothing else this weekend, please do us at Highland Grounds.

9pm
Highland Grounds
742 North Highland Ave.
Hollywood, CA

90038
$7/$5 w/ EvanJunkie Card or Flier

So, you can stop reading there.  Or, if you're looking for more
action... we're here for you:

*At 1pm on Saturday April 29th at the 24th Street Theater you can see
ALL of the members of the Evangenitals participating in Juli's latest
dramatic magnum opus "Orpheus Crawling" composed by Jeremy Zuckerman and
featuring Shaughn Buchholz, Christine Berry, Lisa Dee, and Christopher
Goodson
http://www.24thstreet.org/explore3.html

*At 7pm on Sunday April 30th you can see Juli participate in a Dead
Poet's Slam and Evangina (the ladies of the Evangenitals) perform at the
Mt Hollywood Underground Speakeasy
http://www.evangina.com/calendar.html

We love you.
Warts and All.

Juli, Lisa, Brett, Jones, Salad, and George.
The Evangenitals
www.evangenitals.com

This is the shit.

Hey guys.

I can't make it to this show tonight, but it sounds absolutely awesome
so I thought I'd tip of the rest of y'all --

The man's name is Phillip Roebuck, and he's a ONE MAN BAND. Aww yeah!
And he's playing tonight at Pennylane Records in Pasadena FOR FREE.

I love it.

Represent, represent.

Here's a link to his Myspace page: http://www.myspace.com/philliproebuck

Spread the love.

Support the man with a drum on his back.

xoxo
julio

For the love of all that's good in the world, please go read Brettsky's Blog for a damn fine summary of what's been going down with the Genitals this year.

http://brettsky.blogspot.com/

It's the real dope.

- Juli

Happy Holidays Everyone!

This Weekend, Saturday and Sunday 12/17 and 12/18 from 12pm to 7pm:
SANBORN COTTAGE INDUSTRIES is having an

<<-X-MAS SALE->>

Unique gifts and crafts at reasonable prices
Featuring Original LA Styles from
ORQUIDIA VIOLETA, Clothing and Scarves
CINNAMON ROLL GANG, mutant dolls and bags
SKRAMBLE, Silkscreen prints and clothes
ARACELI SILVA, fine jewelry
RHONDA, paintings and objets d'art
JUDY WINDRA, hula hoops and caps

HOLIDAY SHOPPING in a FESTIVE ATMOSPHERE!

**with live music by the EVANGENITALS (Sat) and TRIPLE CHICKEN FOOT
(Sun)**

come and get it!

Located at 852-856 Sanborn, Silverlake, Los Angeles

The Evangenitals will be playing at 1pm Sharp on Saturday the 17th. A
casual acoustic set, and we're taking requests. This looks like our
last show for 2005, so we encourage you to come on out and stock up on
enough Evangenitals goodness to last you through the New Year.

Go here for the flyer and more information: http://www.evangenitals.com/calendar.html

These are some pics of the EvanGenitals, having a blast, at the Double G Magazine Fundraiser.

Our hats are off to all and sundry who made it there, and there were a LOT of you, seeing as parking in that Echo Park neigh-bor-hood was a major crap-pants affair.

Check out these fine ladies over on Myspace, and please give them the ADD button tickle. Their's is a worthy cause, and we encourage you to support 'em.

Anyhoo... who ain't got love for the lesbians?

Who like LESBIANS????

Hi there.

Hope you had a happy, safe, and not too sugar-shocked Halloween!

To bring ourselves down from the fructose high, The Evangenitals are planning on doing it Low-like at the Lava Lounge on Thursday night.

This Thursday night. November 3rd. At Midnight. Jeff Jones will turn on the Space
Bass, Lisa and Juli will lay out the harmonies, Brett will bend some strings, and the Evangenitals will make slow, sweet, sonic love to all those present.

Since we've been getting rockin'er and rowdier at recent shows, we thought it'd be nice to revisit the slowness. So on Thursday come on down and have a seat, have a sigh, and let us massage your heart for a while.

The Lava Lounge is located at:
1533 North La Brea Ave
Los Angeles, CA, 90028

I know that music starts at 9pm. Shaped Like a Gun and LoFi Sugar are playing, among some other fine folks. The Evangenitals take it down at Midnight.

I know that many of you who read this blog live nowhere near Lost Angeles and cannot attend our local shows. Well, here's something to think about:

If you can't be here with us on our home turf, there are many other things you can do to be a part of the Genital movement. For example,

1. You could visit www.cdbaby.com/cd/evangenitals and check out previews of our
album. If you've heard the album, you can review it on the site, even without
purchasing it there!

2. You could download our tunes off iTunes, and then play them loudly at work.

3. You could be our friend on Myspace or Friendster or Tribe.

4. You could share photos with us at evangenitals.buzznet.com

5. You could tell a friend about the Evangenitals. Tell your mom. Tell your local radio station. Tell your aunt, the rich producer.

All of these things would help the Evangenitals get to your town a whole lot sooner, and then we could finally be together. Just you and us.

The long and short of it is that we love you, and thank you for supporting the
Evangenitals in whatever ways you do.

Sincerely,
Juli, Lisa, Brett, Jones, and Salad
The Evangenitals

(hey now, here's a shout out to the godless comment-spammers, you bastards! see the light and stop the madness! no one follows your devil-links! desist! i always delete you! get the hint, donkey bums!)